Chapter 2 - Audition

Two weeks later

 

Alex

    Alex was humming on her way to her bus stop, going over the song that she was going to audition with for the fall musical. After the first day of school, Maddie, Alicia, and Penny continued to ignore her. Like in math class when she tried to sit with them, they just continued on their conversation without even acknowledging her. It stung, but it’s not like they wouldn’t be friends again. Right?

    Alex waited at the bus stop, nodding her head to the music she was quietly rehearsing. Now that she wasn’t hanging with Maddie and the others so much, she finally decided to audition for the musical. She wanted to do it last year, but the other girls told her it was lame, and she didn’t want to be a loser. But considering that they weren’t talking to her, what did she have to lose?

----

As the final bell rung, Alex headed to the auditorium rather than the school buses. Her hands were sweating, and she couldn’t focus last period because the audition was the only thing on her mind. As she passed the bathroom, Alex turned around, thinking that she could shake out the nerves. When she walked in, planning on doing the “superhero” pose her mom told her about that morning. It was supposed to make you feel confident, but Alex wasn’t too sure. But it would be cool to act like Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel for a little bit. As Alex turned towards the sinks and mirrors, she stopped halfway into her pose.

    Oh no! Her makeup had completely worn out throughout the day. She was going from class to  class and never had the chance to check her makeup. While the pimple from the first day eventually faded, she was beginning to get used to seeing little zits and pimples on her face. She started putting makeup on everyday, not wanting anyone to see her actual face. Now she was worried. When did her makeup fade? How many people saw her like this? And why didn’t anyone tell her?

    Alex reached for her makeup, only to realize that it wasn’t in her backpack. She must have left it in her locker. But the auditions were supposed to happen right after school. If she went back and did her makeup, she’d be late for her slot. Alex clutched the sink, telling herself that it was okay. Everything was all right. This was just like the time she fell off her bike in front of all her friends - er, ex friends?? - and was so embarrassed. But then they didn’t think anything of it. Just like the drama teacher, Ms. Dumont, won’t be thinking anything of her complexion. It was definitely like that. It had to be.

    Alex took a couple deep breaths and decided it was now or never. She put on her fake smile and manufactured cool-girl confidence and walked out of the bathroom. As she did, she thought she heard sniffling from one of the stalls.

Bethany

Bethany was crying in the bathroom as everyone walked to their buses. Last period was math, and she just got back her first quiz of the quarter. She sat there on the toilet, staring at the red, imposing 79. Taysha studied for hours on the quiz and seeing that 79 just told her that all her work was for nothing, that she wasn’t as smart as she wished, that none of her dedication would pay off. What if she ended up getting a C in the class? Then when she went to high school she wouldn’t be placed into the honors section, and what would college think about a girl who only got A’s in normal classes? Anything below an A was failure. B’s and C’s didn’t get into the top schools she dreamt of - NYU, Princeton, William & Mary. Bethany continued to cry in the bathroom, the one next to the drama room that no one goes to because of the mildew-y smell and cracked mirror.

Bethany didn’t want to see anyone right now. Not her teacher, her gave a small shake of disapproval when she gave Bethany her quiz, or her classmates that saw her grade and gave her looks of pity and surprise before she was able to hide the red-covered quiz in her backpack. Even walking to the bathroom, barely keeping her tears in check, the quiz was burning a hole in her backpack. What if someone asked what she got on it? Or asked her how she solved a problem? For the first time, she didn’t have the answers. She wasn’t the smart one. If she wasn’t the star student, who was she? The fat loser? Most of her friends just wanted to do homework with her, which was her basically doing their homework. After they learned about the 79, would they even want to hang out? And how would her dad react? Would she still be able to go to her clarinet lessons, or would she be grounded because of the less than perfect grade?

As if on cue, her dad’s picture came up on her phone as it vibrated. Bethany  took a couple deep breaths - she didn’t want her mom to know that she was crying - and answered the phone.

“Hi, Dad. Are you going to be picking me up soon?”

Part of Bethany  wanted her mom to get her right away; she needed to lay in her bed and just listen to some music before getting back into studying for math again. She obviously needed to put in more work if she wanted to improve her grade for the next quiz. But Taysha also didn’t want her mom to see her with her puffy face from crying.

“Hi Sweetie! I’m actually still at work, and won’t be able to get out for another 40 or so minutes. I hope your day went well though! Did you get that note I put in your lunchbox?”

Bethany breathed a sigh of relief. Her dad  would be here within the hour. She could survive school for that much, and it also gave her enough time to calm down and act like everything was fine.

“Yes, Dad, I got your note. Maybe don’t add those in anymore? I mean, I love you too, but all my friends saw it at lunch and I was really embarrassed. They kept laughing about how my “daddy” still makes lunches for me. Like, if you still want to leave notes, maybe make them less conspicuous?”

The line was silent for a while, and then her dad cleared her throat and said, “Conspicuous, huh? When did you learn that word?”

Bethany was grateful for the subject change. “Just reading, ma. Gotta fill the time in between classes.”

“Okay, well, don’t let all that reading come between your studies! You gotta keep that math grade up!”

And just like that, Bethany’s mood dropped as she remembered the 79.

“Actually, mom, I gotta go. I’ll see you soon, I just remembered that I needed to borrow a book from one of my friends. Bye! See you soon!” Bethany ended the call before she heard a response. She didn't have a book to pick up, but she was tired of thinking about math. The last thing Taysha wanted to do was go and study. Even thinking about it made her eyes well up.

Bethany exited the bathroom, the halls empty. Everyone got on their buses, were picked up by their parents, and left. Instead of going in the direction of the library, a poster right outside the bathroom struck her eye. She didn’t see it on her way in, too focused on not crying until she locked herself in the stall. But now that bright green poster caught her attention, the words, “Fall Musical Auditions TODAY in Auditorium” taking up the whole space. Bethany  looked to the auditorium. Well, she might as well go in and watch the auditions as she waited for her dad.

Taysha (352)

“I double dog dare you!”

Taysha turned back, looking at Alicia, one of the girls on the track team. Her last class, P.E., just let out and everyone ran back to the locker rooms to get their stuff and get on the buses. But right as the class was ending, Alicia dared Taysha to race with her. During class,the teacher, Coach Wright, taught them all about different track sports - running, springs, relay races, hurdles - the list went on. Alicia was supposed to be his star student and lead by example, but Taysha consistently kept pace with her throughout the class. She guessed those jogs with her parents paid off.

Now, Taysha was exhausted. When Alicia first dared her, she just shook it off. All she wanted was to catch the bus, change out of her sweaty clothes, and take a shower when she got home. But as she turned around, she had a glint in her eyes, like when crossed an invisible line and Taysha lashed out. Now it was directed at Alicia. Who did she think she was? Could she really not take some healthy competition?

“Really? A double dog dare, what are you five?” Taysha responded, expecting Alicia to back down.

Alicia’s face reddened, out of exercise or embarrassment Taysha couldn’t tell, but she didn't back down. Alicia responded, “Whoever loses has to audition for the spring musical.”

Taysha blanched; she was a horrible singer and she hated the idea of so many people looking at her. When she was jogging or running, no one was paying attention to her body. They were paying attention to her skill and stamina. But performing? The idea scared Taysha.

But Taysha was never one to back down.

    “Deal.”

---

    Taysha was shocked. How had Alicia beat her? She ran so much faster around the track than she did in class. Was she playing herself down earlier? Taysha managed to keep up for most of the run, but then her leg cramped up, her body not used to sprinting.

    “Good luck in the musical,” Alicia snarked, leaving Taysha sitting stunned on the bleachers.

Alex

Ms. Cortez, the drama teacher, looked at the young girls who were auditioning today. There were barely any boys, which she said was perfect for the musical this year, Dear Edwina. Alex felt nervous under Ms. Cortez’s gaze, but reminded herself that a grown woman shouldn’t care about a teenager's acne. She pictured herself just moments ago in the mirror, thinking about how prominent she looked with her hands on her hips, and tried to restore some of that confidence.

Ms. Cortez clapped her hands to get the attention of the girls on the drama stage.

“Okay girls, here’s what we’re going to do! Put your name on these scraps of paper and put them in this hat!” Ms. Cortez brandished one of those big performer hats that Alex only saw on TV shows. She didn’t actually think they were real.

The girls all went up and wrote their names on the pieces of paper. Some with flourish, and others with a little shake to their hands, like Alex. After Alex wrote down her own name, she surveyed the group of girls. Most looked excited and nervous to be there, but there was one girl who looked absolutely disdainful. Alex wondered what the girl’s problem was.

Ms. Cortez shook the hat, and drew out the first name.

“Alex! You’re up! Let’s see what you got.”

Alex’s stomach dropped. Really? The first one. Her nerves shot up as she realized that all these girls would be watching her sing. But then she thought of how fun she had practicing all weekend, and how her mom was humming “Sing Your Own Song” today while she was getting ready, not even noticing it. And she thought that she’d feel much worse if she didn’t audition than if she did and everyone made fun of her.

Taysha

The last thing Taysha wanted to do was audition for the school musical. All the other girls looked so excited, on the edge of their seats as the first  girl started to sing, but she was deep in the back, trying to make herself invisible. Sure, she liked having attention, but the idea of going on stage every night for a week? No way. Taysha was still sulking as the first girl stood up.

    Taysha knew who she was. Last year she was one of the “it” girls. Perfect clothes, perfect hair, and seemingly perfect friendships. Taysha and her were in different friend groups, but it wasn’t until Alex took up the stage that she realized she hadn’t seen her sitting with Maddie at lunch the past. As Alex took her spot, Taysha looked at her. Nothing seemed to have changed, so she wondered what the big deal was.

    Taysha’s wonderings about the Alex’s drama faded away when Alex began to sing. Shit! That girl could sing! Who knew that such a mean girl had some real skill underneath all that lip gloss and brand names?

    As Alex finished up her audition, Taysha knew that girl just got the lead role. And then a sinking realization came to her: all the girls had time to prepare the audition song. Taysha didn’t even know it. This was going to be a dumpster fire of an audition.

    On cue, Alex finished up her song. Everyone clapped, and Ms. Cortez said, “Very good, Alex. Next up…. Taysha!”

Bethany

Bethany watched as the girls auditioned one by one. The standout was for sure Alex, one of the poplar girls. She still remembered how her, Maddie, and Penny would all give her a once-over last year, judging her ill-fitting clothes. Bethany always tried to stray away from those girls, so she figured it’s a good thing she wasn’t auditioning for the play. She would hate to be in Alex’s judging presence day in and day out.

As the last girls auditioned, Bethany realized that her dad would be here any second to pick her up. She dreaded talking to him about the math grade, and wished she had better news to soften the blow. The last thing she wanted was to disappoint her dad. She thought back to the auditions - none of the girls were horrible. She was expecting some really bad auditions, like the ones in that old Disney channel movie High School Musical that played midday over the summer. There was only one weird audition, when one of the girls didn’t sing but instead walked up to Ms. Cortez and just talked to her. She had no idea what that was about, but the girl didn’t sing, just sat back down in her seat.

Bethany’s phone chirped. She just got a text from her dad that said, Just outside!

Bethany knew it was time to face the chorus and tell her dad about the 79. As she walked out of the theater, she began quietly singing the song everyone auditioned with, “Sing Your Own Song.”

Bethany quietly sang her favorite voice, not wanting to draw any attention to herself.

“Oh, to be normal, to be a safe and unassuming shade of grey. Not too different, not too smart, no more poems in your heart. Do you really want to live your life that way?”

Just as she reached the auditorium doors, she heard a voice call out, “Did you audition? What’s your name?”

Bethany turned to see Ms. Cortez.

“Oh, no Ms. Cortez. I just...well, I was watching the auditions, that’s all. Just waiting for my dad to pick me up.”

“Well, what’s your name?” Ms. Cortez asked

“Um, Bethany Ritter.” Bethany responded.

“Okay, Bethany.” Ms. Cortez responded with a smile. “Are you interested in the musical?”

What? Bethany couldn’t believe what she just heard. “M-me? In the musical?”

“Yeah, Bethany, you! I don’t know if we would have a starting spot for you in the musical, but keep your eye out for the call sheet!” And with that, Ms. Cortez walked out of the auditorium, leaving Bethany wondering what just happened.